Imposing Our Will

Another idea of the CM Method of learning is not overly imposing our wishes or ideas on children. We are to have "influence" but not dictate everything about what and how a child learns or make them into who we want them to be instead of who God intends for them to be. I found this a bit of a paradox at first. I am after all the parent which is my God given role. I began to understand this the more I implemented the idea slowly in areas I found myself trying to influence my idea of what would be fun or good in little things.

As Lilly's birthday neared I knew she wanted to have a sleep-over. I am not a big fan of sleep-over's. I remember some of the craziness that occurred when I was a child at all night extravaganzas. But, Lilly "reeeeaaalllllyyyyyy" wanted to have a sleep over and I figured 3rd grade was better than 7th or 8th grade. So, I decided to let go and listen to her ideas.

After discussing this with her I was a bit concerned. First, she wanted a "nature party". Lilly loves all the things we learn and do in nature. This is all wonderful for us. But, considering the exposure other kids may or may not have had I worried about how well this idea would be received by her friends. Would they make fun of the different ideas she had, etc? I found myself asking these types of questions.... imposing my ideas. I stopped myself and let her enthusiastically tell me all her ideas. As I listened, I realized her ideas were much more in-line with what I would think of as a "proper sleep-over". It really sounded more like a camp-out. This sounded much better to me than Hannah Montana movies, popcorn everywhere and staying up until the wee hours of the morning. My one rule set in stone was--lights out at 10:30p.m..

She decided on 13 friends. Ten of which showed up the day of the party. I made out a schedule and included it in the invitation. As a parent, I knew I would appreciate knowing all the details. I also didn't want the kids expecting to stay up all night. Our schedule was: Come over after school, play and get to know one another, make crafts, go on a nature walk, dinner, movie, roast marshmallows, tell nature stories by the fire and then lights out by 10:30. I really doubted they'd be asleep by 11:00. But I was determined to give it a shot.

We made riddles instead of going on a scavenger hunt--Lilly's idea. All of the items we made riddles for were the party favors as well as things we used on our nature walk--a compass, a magnifying glass, bubbles (told us which way the wind was blowing), flashlight, pencil for taking notes, a watch, a whistle and a penny--to use as a guide to find something small enough to fit under the microscope. We also made a nature guide and titled it "Lilly's Nature Guide". We slathered ourselves in bug spray and headed out to the field behind our house. I was amazed at all the things the kids spotted. Baby frogs, purple flowers, mushrooms, cactus, just to name a few. The kids had a blast and some enjoyed looking at items under the microscope in between playing in the tent and blowing bubbles when we got back.

By the time we completed all the activities... it was 10:00. Just enough time to get everyone in their P.J.'s and set up sleeping bags. With everyone settled by 10:30 I began to read. Almost every child was asleep by 11:00. Lilly was so excited she couldn't sleep and finally decided to go to her room to sleep. Overall, the party was a huge success. The kids had fun and maybe even learned a few things as well. Allowing kids more freedom to fulfill their ideas in life can be truly rewarding.... even if it's a simple sleep-over.

Me? I could never homeschool!

We've officially been "homeschooling" for three weeks now. All of our curriculum still hasn't arrived but I have been supplementing with other supplies and books from the library. Our math curriculum may not be here for another two weeks! A good thing to remember next year--order early.

My main focus has been getting into a routine and forming those "habits". The first two weeks were a little difficult. Zane hadn't started school, we were still recovering from vacation and the death of our precious Uncle David. I can't believe how much has changed and what homeschooling has brought to fruition in our lives in a mere three weeks!

The first week we just got our feet wet so speak. We began with our habit goals of getting up, having devotion time, making our bed and getting dressed with no reminders. Pocahontas is doing great with this. In fact, I may add a chore to her daily habit forming routine next week. Z is doing good as well considering his age and the fact that he started school this week. He told me after his open house that he wants to go to school "EVERY DAY and WITHOUT me"! This is a night and day change from last year. So, Lilly and I have the mornings to accomplish any school that needs to be one-on-one. We pick Zane up at 11:30, have lunch, play, read together then have nap and independent reading. We started this routine on Wednesday. Next week we will start our "regular schedule" and hopefully get into a good "rut" (forming those habits).

One thing I LOVE about homeschooling is the idea of getting to know each child individually--deeply. Not that we didn't want or do this before homeschool. This is just taking it to a new level. Learning their strengths and weaknesses on a level that allows you to discuss and formulate a plan with them that helps them succeed. For example Miss Pocahontas does not enjoy writing in the least. I've struggled with getting her to write neatly for years--I'm a Kindergarten teacher for heavens sake! I finally made a break through today--I listened to her complaints without judgement. We went to Hobby Lobby and got some cool multicolored pencils, made a plan for her to proactively take control her frustrations. Then, discussed perseverance and began our "Handwriting Without Tears" lesson with lots of praise. We ended dancing, singing and laughing. Yesterday and many days before it ended with tears and frustration. YEA!

The kids have also started a prayer journal along with their daily devotionals. They can write or draw in as much detail as they feel comfortable. They know they are writing to God and should do their best. Of course Z and I share devotional time and I write what he says and he draws a simple picture--I also add comments for him to read when he's older. I thought I'd include this example to show how his little mind is learning to relate his world to God and lean on Him--I hope you can read the words. His little drawing is of him on a trail at a local birding park. Z is so precious during these times. His questions are priceless and his comments are both childlike and profound.

Did I ever say "I could NEVER homeschool!" ?

Looking up

As the afternoon came to a close, I began thinking about our day and today felt like a total failure. A big part of Charlotte Mason homeschooling is "habit training". Reflecting on our day my mind immediately went to the negative--"Ugh!...no habits formed today." I let Pocahontas sleep in because she had a homeschool swim party until 8:30 last night. So, naturally after our normal bedtime routine it was 10 pm--before they got into bed. Gee, only two hours late! She woke up grumpy and tired. But somehow she made her bed & did her devotional. We did math, recitations, hymns, reading & nature all by 1:00. Next, a little playtime & then upstairs for nap & independent reading. Narrations will be done at dinner for dad. I walked upstairs to check on the kids. First I peak in Pocahontas' room. Her bed is made, her room is clean and her blanket is even folded nicely on the bed. On to Z's room, as I walk I'm thinking "Why are they so quiet? This is not normal."! I opened the door to find P singing Z songs. She had already read him two nap time stories. She loves being a big sister...most of the time. :)

Wow! Time to reevaluate the day. Another one of CM's philosophy is baby steps. It all takes time. Why do we tend to think first of the negative? Yes, I need to do about 4 loads of laundry, clean the kitchen & water the yard. I also need to make dinner and probably 4,000 other things. But, I no longer think today was mostly a loss & that I've failed. Thank you Lord.

My goal for our 1st term was for the kids to independently get up, make their bed, get dressed & "P" to do her devotional before coming down to breakfast. Hmmm... maybe we can actually make this work.